now it’s a new year…
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so, i must admit, i’m still a little edgy about updating the ol’ whore from the land of hell. for one, they keep us nut sack-slammed the whole time we’re there…
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i LOVE the other bit today, but i can’t write this weekend, so here’s a bonus to help make it through til monday…
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this has got to be a joke…
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it’s about damn time. that’s all i have to say. it’s about fucking time…
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some people need to read the whore more often…

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saturday is the day…
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so, today i got a bit of bad news…

i DIDN’T get the job at the comedy club i was up for. not enough (read: NONE) restaurant & bar experience. at least not in an employment sense. plenty of experience as a patron of both (particularly the latter these days). but no employment history there. so, the hunt is on again.

last night i had a dream (no, not that kind) and eddie (as in griffin) was in it (now you see why i made the “not that…” comment so early.) but he wasn’t live. he was on a wall of televisions. and he wasn’t saying anything we’d discussed in person. it was a brief clip from one of his hbo specials, running over and over again. just the same line, which in context, was about being in a window seat of an airplane as it nose dived. the line?

“ground coming up…quicker than a motherfucker…”

which made me wonder; am i bottoming out here? in the past, when i’ve had the forced job search thang going, i had some kinda of substantial finance back up working. had a big chunk o’ change in the bank. or a part-time job that could become full-time easily. or both. now i have neither. and resume after resume is getting no return calls. no es bueno.

but why no returns? why no calls? my six pack of reasons…

1. i’m too witty honestly…who would hire someone who’s gonna be more liked and revered by the staff than the boss, right?

2. i’m too good looking i mean, you might have been having your way with the hot, fresh-outta-college blonde girl BEFORE you hire me, but once i’m there? who’s she gonna choose?

3. i’m too bright nobody likes to look stupid. especially if it’s taken in the literal sense. and compared to me, who doesn’t?

4. i’m too experienced with my wide range of experience, education, and natural abilities, i am the poster boy for “over qualified”…

5. i’ve got too good a work ethic i am so about being the model employee, there are no words. i make even bosses look bad. how can you “lead by example” after all that?

6. i’m just too fucking good meant in the general sense. just to cover my bases…

now, do i believe any of this shit i just listed? in a word,

FUCK NO!!!

okay, so that was two words. maybe it’s these little detail things i miss that are causing my unemployment to stretch into this, it’s second week. (i don’t count the two weeks prior since i wasn’t even looking but was instead doing the promo work for ed’s stuff for the most part). or maybe just ’cause the job market in austin sucks. all i know is, i’m kinda spooked ’cause this time of year was when i was looking last time, and it took until MARCH. and i didn’t have a house payment looming over me then. so, i’m kinda scared. think hopeful thoughts. or just give me money. or both. both would be best…

so, here’s the way i see it…

many people will tell you that the “true” definition of insanity is “repeating the exact same actions, over and over again, under the exact same circumstances, but expecting it you yield varying results.”

to this, i disagree.

i used to agree. but then i started dating. once you deal with the opposite sex you realize that we all have to be insane from time to time. it’s called a “relationship”. and now what used to be called “insanity” now must be called “interacting”. or “having a meaningful dialog”.

but circumstantially, i think i’ve found one that fits my day-to-day existence…

the true definition of insanity for me these days is dozens of resumes being sent out, zero responses, and worst of all NO CABLE. it can all be placated by a simple flick of the remote button typically, and now it’s no go. no es bueno. so here’s to hoping my interview mañana before i go grab my passes for shiner bocktoberfest and head off to journal con on friday goes well. it IS with the comedy club, so let’s see how it plays out. hopefully this one will have a happy “punch line” at the end, and the joke won’t be ON me.

and if not?

then i get to slowly go insane with only one channel of tv to stare blankly at for days at a stretch…but at least, thanks to the whore, you all get to watch it happen, right? maybe i’ll drag in cameras and put it on pay-per-view. that way we can pay off time warner and give me HUNDREDS of channels of NOTHING to watch instead of just one…

Replies: 2 Comments

“only the insane have the strength to prosper ~ only those that prosper truly judge what is sane.”

(or something like that) said @ 10/16/2003 11:05 PM CST

one channel or hundreds, 99% of television is crap(except the simpsons). sometimes i wish the fucking thing was never invented(except for football). we would all be better off if we just smashed the fuckin things(except porn).

aw fuck it… i think i’ll go watch tv

shane said @ 10/16/2003 04:49 PM CST

first off, y’all don’t mind if i do everything in my power to getting back to doing this on a daily basis, do you? i’m having to do the cyber equivalent of couch surfing to do so, but one must do what one must do, right?
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