there’s there WAS an app for that

pederass mother fuckers have ruined countless lives…

…but now they’re fuckin’ with my sleep!

that, dear readers, is the main reason i have the reefer. the ganja. the marijuana. the “devil’s lettuce”, as admittedly few call it but i find the term hilarious so i’ll include it. my source for such things has always been a gentleman who only worked by referral and worked exclusively through an encrypted messenger app called “wickr me”. he’s taken care of me for years. i know what part of town he lives in. what city his girlfriend comes from. that he loves ju jitsu. what i DON’T know is his real name or another way to get ahold of him. but who needed that info? he’s my weed guy, he’s great, he offers it all (edibles, vapes, flower) and he’s on my side of town. how could this go wrong?

pedophiles – that’s how this can go wrong.

not that my guy was one of those. at least i ASSUME he wasn’t. never came off even remotely creepy to me. but apparently a lot of them used that app, that had just recently been purchased by the amazon folk back in 2001. when it came to light that was a thing, they shut down any new members from joining the app in january of 2022. i’d heard about that door closing but thought, “i’m already in, my ‘guy’ is already in, who gives a shit?” and moved on.

but last week i noticed one of my vapes was running low. i actually have three – one that amps you up, one that knocks you out, and one that’s basically half way in between. the last one is the one running low, so i decided to see if “sauce” (the actual brand i like, in case you live in a state where this is legal and wanna mail me something) was on “the menu” (the term my guy insisted you use to see his inventory, even though we were on an encrypted app) but the app wouldn’t log me in, it just kept sitting on the “loading” screen and not moving.

after three or four attempts of this i decided to hit the googles to see if there was anything up about the app having issues or needing some kind of update or what have you.

boy, were there some articles alright!

first was about the amazon purchase in 2021. then the new member shutdown of 2022. then about the nbc expos√© about how it was the go to app for people trading in illicit pics of minors and such. THAT was enough for them to say “fuck all this” and announce the private sector part of the app (apparently there’s a government version still very much in use) would be shut down as of january 1st, 2024.

that was a memo i’d missed.

my guy’s prices on flower were, admittedly, a bit high (pun intended) but the quality and variety of mediums more than made up for it. because of this, however, all my coworkers (who buy predominantly flower and a lot more of it than i do) had started sourcing elsewhere so that, when this happened, nobody knew an alternate way to get in touch with this guy. so i guess this is just gone, which sucks.

now begins the hunt for a new connect – why can’t texas just legalize this shit so i can order my vapes via mail in peace, damn it?

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