booze and kimberly – a surprisingly seinfeldian flashback

so, i THOUGHT we had a new “perfectly aged” bit for today…

…the archives had no bits from august 2nd to august 10th, but it turns out the bit listed as the 10th was originally done on the 6th (not quite sure how i fucked that up) so i grabbed one of two off the fifth because the other one was just one of those “hey check out this link” kinda bits mentioning the end of JAB’s twenties (he’s now just started the last year of his forties) and john mark sending the link to me and he died of liver cancer almost two years ago so i went with what i thought would be more festive…

08/05/2002: “you got a pretty mouth on you, girl…”

sundays always get kinda jacked up in my world. i don’t know why, but they do. today was supposed to be all about grilling. shane and his new girl were gonna come over so he could see the newest member of the pup tribe, and throw some steaks on the grill. but such was not the case…

we HAD said about two. at one thirty, i realized it was just TOO damn hot for me to make a fire outside and stand by it, so i called him and suggested we just go eat at black’s or something. he said that sounded good, but that he was gonna be a little late. at THREE THIRTY, i called him to just call the whole thing off ’cause i was starving and was gonna eat without him. so by four, i finally got some food in me. and due to waiting a while, and the fact that all the folks at black’s like me (except, unfortunately, for the REALLY cute latina that works the soda counter…well, she MIGHT like me, just not in the way i want her to) i was DAMN stuffed off of my usual lunch. i knew i would have no interest in eating for the rest of the day, if not the week…

then the phone rang, and a dinner request was made. the cons of this situation:

a. i KNEW i would be paying for everything
b. i KNEW i would have to drive about 130 miles round trip
c. i KNEW i would not EVEN wanna eat, or possibly even drink water, because i was THAT full…

now, on to the pros:

a. she’s got great tits
b. she’s got an awesome ghetto butt
c. she can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch*

*or so i’ve been told…remember, i’m “special”…

yes, it’s the girl with the awesome smile and even more awe-inspiring pierced 38Ds who has actually uttered the phrase, “all i want is for a guy to fuck me in the ass and cum on my face…is THAT too much to ask for?”

so, realizing that i would get just as much housework done if i stayed at home and watched the simpson’s or if i was sucking tequila shots out of someone’s tanned, pierced navel, i headed off to SA to pick up kimberly, the porn star in training (now of the sun-bleached blonde variety).

(so, neither of those things ACTUALLY happened on my sunday night, ’cause remember, i’m “special” (she will SO never live that down) but it made for a good line, right?)

kimberly’s a good chick to hang out with for a LOT of reasons, but the whole bisexual thing is one of the cooler ones. we’re sitting there, gabbing away like we do, and all of a sudden she’s kicking me in the shins and doing that clinched-teeth talk where you’re trying to say something without being loud of your lips moving…


i look behind me, and there are the SA equivalent of christina and brittney (i.e. two HOT blondes) standing there waiting for a table. i turn back around and see that look in the kimberly’s baby blues that let me know that she was just as turned on as i was…and picturing herself doing about the same things to them that i was picturing.

i think this is what they call “bonding”.

then it was back in the ‘bu to roll around SA. pretty much ALL of it. i had the “liquid lunch” at chili’s (i.e. two presidente margaritas, and nothing more…but i DID keep the shaker), but felt NO buzz, and it WAS a nice night, so off we went….the loop……1604 to 281 to i35 to 1604 again, and off to her house in live oak, where she doesn’t even realize her happiness could be just a click away…

Replies: 1 Comment

I think I need to meet this similar chick…what do you think?

Pierced said @ 08/06/2002 01:24 AM GMT

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