one and done ain’t my kinda fun

car stuff always stresses me the fuck out…

…but while the BMW being laid up for a weekend just ’cause i didn’t have a special tool you need to get to the damn belt that shredded, all the extra time with the ufc has made it worth it…and a lot of fun!

all i can say is if this is what being married to the little lady is like i might need to sign up for that shit.

for a sixer today i (we, actually) present “mood killers”. sometimes when you get some, you get a second round. maybe you just wanna get some sleep, and you know you’re significant other will want another go, and you want to change that. or sometimes you’re down, but then you do something stupid…or maybe say something that just kills the mood:

that’s right – you say the wrong shit. okay, so for some of you the scene above was a turn-on (the original line was “i want to have your abortion”, but they realized that might get the film banned in texas so they changed it).

what else could kill the mood? well…

i just came so hard i shit myself! – sort of a compliment, but would definitely make a second round rougher…for more than one reason.

bet your momma REALLY wouldn’t like me now! – pretty much any reference to the parental units of the person you just fucked during the afterglow

from this angle your ass doesn’t look fat! – female readers can feel free to use “it’s not as small as i thought” or something…

that dang near reminds me of bible camp! – almost any religious reference will do…

i guess i can take that ad off craigslist! – especially effective if you’re sleeping with your spouse.

and finally…

you fuck almost as good as my sister! – not effective if you’re an only child, in which case you can go with remixed “…good as YOUR sister!”. of course, if the partner is an only child as well then you’re pretty much screwed (get it!?!?)

i should add none of these killed our mood, but loaded up on tequila it was fun to come up with them!

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