so, here’s a weird one…
…on this day, twenty years ago, i can only trust that i was super bored, ME was super bored (still in a holding pattern but improving from what her husband tells me, to update y’all on our covid queen) because there were THREE separate bits written for today. back then, if she was bored at work, she would hit me up and i’d write a bit to amuse her. we were cool like that. with THREE bits written for today, one of us must have been REALLY bored (this was a monday in 2002) but here’s the really fun part – NONE of the three bits have been re-published since the original time – until today!
02/18/2002: “plans as solid as nerf”
so this, i don’t get…lately for me, making plans with more than ten minutes of advance notice is a futile attempt. back during mercury’s michael jackson phase (i.e. moon walking backwards through the sky), when communication goes to hell, it was SUPPOSED to be worse. but this weekend was a definite “shout out” to the merc issues (if you will allow me to ghettofy astrology for a moment). this is the weekend night plans at a glance…
thursday: talk to my buddy james, and he ask me to go see carlos mencia with him on friday night. says he HAD asked a girl, but she hadn’t called back, and he didn’t think she would. so plans were set for friday.
friday: after office time (which was WAY stressful for the most part), i’m on my way to work the hockey game, and call james to make sure all is still cool. he says so far, so “me”, but if anything changes, he’ll buzz the mobile. i get done with the hockey game, call him to let him know i’m on the way to the studio (he DJs where i used to at 101x), and he says, “dude…i was just about to call you…she called. and tits win”. lovely. so, i flip a bitch back to the hockey stadium to find junior to see if he wants to grab dinner. me, him, and his girl go hit macaroni grill, and decide that the three of US wanna go to see carlos on saturday night.
saturday: after a semi-scheduled work appearance (that REALLY dragged on later than it was supposed to), i go to pick up carlos tickets. two shows saturday. sold out. two shows sunday. sold out. i found out later that all of these shows (which were not promoted till 24 hours before the first one) happened because carlos HAD been hired to work a private ENRON party. guess you all know what happened with THAT check, huh? so i walk away from the club, thinking that that’s it. can’t happen. then, i get a wild hair, call james, and he says he’ll make some calls, but is doubtful. let’s do it time-line style for a moment…
1:30 – initial call to james
3:00 – correction call to james, telling him we weren’t looking for hand-outs, and would pay for tickets
4:40 – first call FROM james, saying things didn’t look good, since NOBODY was calling him back
6:00 – i get to the hockey stadium, tell junior, and he says it’s okay, ’cause linda went to SA to see her folks – so i say, “so, IF we get tickets, we only need TWO?” he says, “yes”, so i call james and tell him two instead of three, but he still says, “haven’t heard back…don’t even know if ONE is possible”
6:03 – yes, THREE minutes later, james calls back to say me and junior are hooked in…for free. AND we get to skip the line (which was approximately two blocks long)
6:05 – junior calls linda, just to say, “hi”, and finds out she’s in san marcos on her way BACK to austin ’cause she thought we were all going to see carlos that night. mercury flashbacks, anyone?
she finds out we only got two tickets since we thought she was outta town, she’s cool with it, and me and junior go see an AWESOME show. carlos is a comedic firestorm. a three hour set, where you almost NEVER stop laughing. we got seated so early, junior, me, and carlos were practically the only people in the room; so i went up and talked to him, and we hit it off pretty well. now the crowd files in. a couple of thousand people it seemed. the owner, who i know by face but his name escapes me, comes over, says hi, and comps me a round of drinks. then the manager keeps bringing me absolut shots (including two round in the last five minutes of the set…has he never heard of a DWI before?) and even CARLOS came by the table, and said, “whussup” at one point. at the end of the night, a girl at the table behind me tapped me on the shoulder and said, “the owner keeps coming up and talking to you. the manager keeps bringing you vodka. carlos came by your table. his manager sat with you for part of the set. WHO ARE YOU?!?!?” i just smiled, and said, “just a guy with mother-fucking charm”. and to think, tonight’s the system of a down show. on MY home turf. for all the crappy stuff this weekend, maybe it won’t turn out all bad after all…tell you about THAT show tomorrow…