golden goodness my ass!

as i said to the ufc the other day…

…i have never been more hyped up AND more let down by a convenience store product…ever.

i need to get back in shape. i’m a fat kid at heart and it shows. but i need to reign that shit in for my wedding. can’t be letting my self get all photographafied all fat-ass and shit. that being said, put certain junk food in front of me and you get me – and an old stand-by from my forty-plus days (waist wise) is nacho cheese doritos. stuff those with queso? shiiiiiiit…


what “loaded doritos” look like on the poster-sized stickers on the outside of 7-11: a small empanada lightly dusted with the doritos nacho cheese spices we know and love filled with a golden bubbly velveetaesque cheese product.

what “loaded dortios” actually are: an over-nuked odd textured pouch that’s not quite soft and not quite crunchy and yet still hard to bite or chew that’s two thickish layers of corny mush with a tissue-paper thin ribbon of cheese stuff that’s more than half absorbed by the spongy corn tortilla wanna-be substance that surrounds it.

they come in packs of four for two bucks…i could barely choke down two.

completely and utterly disappointing.

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