functional drinking

i’ve always said there were two types of weed smokers…

…”AND smokers” and “smokers”.

the difference?

“AND smokers” are the kind that use the word “and” after they talk about smoking…i.e. “i’m gonna go home, smoke some weed, AND clean my house…”. or something like that. than there’s the rest of us (including myself): “i’m gonna go home and smoke some weed…”. that was it. the end of the line. there might be some laundry. there might be some food cooked. but for the most part, THAT was the plan. i was never able to smoke weed AND do something. at least not something PLANNED. yeah, SOMETHING might happen, but it was pure fucking coincidence if it did.

drinking is another story…

…i noticed recently i had no motivation to do housework. none. i don’t know if it was exhaustion from all the heat, or boredom, or depression from spending so much time alone, but i just had NO energy to clean the house, do laundry, nothing. so i went and bought a bottle of wine. drank it. THEN the cleaning started. and the laundry. and shit got done.

so i guess i’m an “AND” drinker…just not an “AND smoker”.

it’s good to know that about yourself.

today it was all about the final clean out. as i’m typing this (11:27pm on wednesday) it’s been an eventfuly day…my tiger reticulated python died (she’s been sick a while, so this was not a huge shock – boa’s still alive for now, but i’ve realize since ’tish died my heart just isn’t in this “reptile parenting” thing like it used to be) and i’ve said “ado” to my grandmother’s house. all the furniture i want is in MY house. all the furniture my sister wants is in a storage unit. and all that’s left? i could give a shit about. now we’re down to the goodfellas part of the deal…

“fuck you, pay me”.

i have some debts. some bad ones. hopefully they don’t come back to bite me in the ass when i go to cash a five figure check…so, here’s my plan: if all goes well, you’ll see a sunday sixer about how my life rocks. if it doesn’t, you’ll see a sunday sixer about how bad my life sucks – ’cause that will pretty much ruin it. place your bets, i’ll set a re-run for friday, and away we go…

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  • Shane Sep 1, 2011 @ 20:27

    I never thought I’d have to teach you to multi-task bitch! Smoking weed and doing anything is easy, you just gotta be ready to do whatever the shitty job is before you start. If you’re not it aint gonna happen anyway. That simple.

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