just in time for st. patrick’s day…mcniggas!

okay, so it’s 7:35am the morning before st. patrick’s day when i’m starting this, i’ve got the latest dropkick cd blaring, and i already have a glass of bushmill’s in one hand and a lit cigar in the other…

…why? ’cause i have a problem? nope – ’cause the mood has to be set for the bit.

(and it’s amazing the shit i think of, and think is funny as hell, when i’m ripped out of my gourd)

so, a week or two ago, when i was beyond messed up with shane and harold (which was achieved by 2pm in the afternoon on a wednesday ’cause, well, that’s the kind of lives we lead) i came up with an idea that, in hindsight, i realize was a lesson in tolerance – which with all the turmoil in the middle east, and the oceans trying to claim back the land ’twas once theres (see “japan”) it seems this is a time where tolerance is needed. at the core of said lesson? something Mom used to say (not that she wrote this originally, but it IS where i first heard it):

sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me…

really…i don’t know why words seem to bug people. they’re JUST words. i can understand how a word that seems harmless (fat) can be made hurtful (you look more fat than i remember you) in context. THAT i get. what i don’t get is why certain words (cunt, nigger, wetback, chinc, etc) are considered “bad” just on their own. regardless of context. there’s no usage of the word “cunt” that won’t offend the average female – none. never mind the fact that it’s in shakespeare – it’s just “bad” to them. likewise, “nigger” or any version thereof (drop the “er” and swap in an “a”) and you have a fight on your hands in certain parts of town…regardless of the town.

personally, i think that’s stupid. it’s just a fucking word – a few letters pieced together to make a phonetic sound. a syllable or two. and for me uttering it you can get all riled up, maybe even punch me in the face? fuck all that shit – just fire a word back.

i’m getting off track here – but in a way, just establishing the bit. or the motivation behind it…it’s just at the time the idea came up i was a little too ripped to articulate this. but as it’s now (checks time) 7:45am this is only the FIRST round of whiskey (hey – it’s not like i have THAT big a problem) so i’m still coherent and can articulate a little more clearly.

at the heart of this i came up with the idea for an irish street gang (while i don’t condone gang violence and as a result would never do this in real life, i make have to get a book going on this) called “the McNiggas”. i thought the idea was brilliant – the news media could NEVER report our names in print OR on tv ’cause it would offend too many people. and once we got some power behind us we could get little offshoots going – “O’ Porch Monkeys” and such. use every racial term, typically used in a derogatory way towards blacks, towards whites…and if we used those terms on OURSELVES to the point where it was acceptable to say in front of anybody, the words would “lose their power” to offend and hence fade away into history.

but at the time, it was just funny as shit for three ripped irish guys to use the term “McNiggas”. i even came up with a gang sign:

but at the heart of it was not to offend, but rather illustrate tolerance. see, i’m a profound motherfucker (and a charming one as well, lest we forget – see the masthead) but i could only get the term, not the full story behind it, out of my mouth when i was fucked up that day…or at least i don’t THINK i could. hard to recall. all i know is both harold AND shane have been chomping at the bit for me to do this bit…