a flashback friday bit about fucking…sorta

the part i laughed at the most re-reading this one?

i start off saying it’ll be “short” due to my back hurting, because writing is SUCH a physical activity…and this is long by today’s standards, ain’t it?

02/14/2003: “strangelove”
okay, so this is gonna be a short one…i’m sick, i pulled a muscle in my back from coughing too hard(who knew that was possible?), i’ve got the massive valentine’s day depression going, and i had gas company issues when i went to take a shower so i had no hot water. before i left for okc, the ka fraternity got suspended on ut campus for a racially themed party; which was not the first time they’ve done such things…this IS the frat that considers it’s spiritual founder to be robert e. lee and they try to follow many of his beliefs (keep in mind which side of the civil war he ran, k?). but we’ll deal with that tomorrow…and quote the valarian as we do (the “secret” text of the kappa alpha order…i have a copy at home. don’t ask). for now, let’s talk about pussy…

when i was at sharp things the last time (that’s sharp things tattoo & body piercing, on the square in san marcos…512-353-1170) i swiped a copy of FHM magazine ’cause it was the music issue and i was mid-article when i went to take harold home (harold being the guy who did 90% of my tattoos, and is the owner of sharp things tattoo & body piercing, on the square in san marcos…512-353-1170)

(side note: the shop closed in 2008 so don’t try to call)

what can i say…i have been SORELY neglecting promoting homeboy’s studio. now where was i? oh yeah…the magazine.

in it there was an interview with a bunch of groupies, talking about their rock n’ roll “contributions”. a young “lady” on the panel said she had her first orgasm when she fucked dave gahan, vocalist for depeche mode, on the master and servant tour. that tour took place in 1984. looking at their picture, she looks a hair bit older than me, but i’ve aged pretty well from what i’ve been told. she listed her age as “24”, which didn’t EVEN seem right. this brought to mind several theories, and i’m wondering which was right…

a. she lied about her age to the magazine, although you’d think she’d have to show i.d., right?
b. they just mis-printed her age, possibly correcting in a later issue that i never saw, since the one i was reading WAS over a year old.
c. it’s all accurate, and the vocalist for my favorite band ever gave a seven year old girl her first orgasm. ick.

what do you think?

second side note: i’m not sure where i saved it, but somewhere in my archives i have an email from said woman, who said part of the paperwork they had to sign to be in the pic bit was to allow them certain editorial freedom, up to and including their age. she wasn’t “24”, she was “35”, and that eleven year difference made her actually eighteen at the time of said incident…

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