woke up, people

i think the alt right crowd might be taking this “woke” thing a bit far…

…while i’ve long believed part of the magic of dropping that word everywhere is the fact that the bulk of them actually know how to spell it (say what you wish, but autocorrect hasn’t been able to salvage some of the brutal takes on “diversity”, “inclusion”, and the mother of all, “indoctrination” – but “woke” they can nail every time!) i think it’s basically a way to justify your racism…you know, to save the children.

it’s all about the children. all fourteen words.

something they don’t seem to realize – white folk, claiming outlandish shit, and hiding behind the excuse that they’re doing it all “for the children” has been done. a lot. the white nationalist movement of the 1980’s and 1990’s had their “fourteen words” – “we must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children“ followed, occasionally, by another fourteen words, “because the beauty of the white aryan woman must not perish from the earth”.

saving the women and children – those nazi fucks are some chivalrous motherphukers, ain’t they?

i feel like the second one they drew out to fourteen words on purpose. “white aryan woman”? is there another shade of “aryan woman”? redundancy for redundancy’s sake? just to hit the number? if you’re gonna harp on the whole “we’re white, go back to where you came from” bullshit, which usually includes “speak english” shouldn’t you also speak it properly, even if it’s in small words? i’m just saying.

so let’s look at these four little letters – “woke”. originally taken from black culture, as white folk are wont to do, it meant to literally (mentally) wake up and be aware that yes, virginia, there are folks out there that aren’t white, or straight, or christian…they exist. they have the same rights as you do!

well, for now…but some are desperately trying to change that. don’t they still listen to this guy?

so the two newest targets (the last one, ironically, being the store chain ‘target’), are jack daniels and chick-fil-a. the former is simply because they hired a director of diversity, equity, and inclusion. given the company’s history with…well…anyone NOT christian and white lately, this wasn’t a bad move. but it was done literally YEARS ago. like the end of 2021. people have just been combing corporate websites, looking for something to direct their outrage at, and here we are. they hired a black dude, to make sure they weren’t being “THAT” company. how is that bad. hasn’t seemed to slow down the outlandish amount of folks that will kill off 98% of their lunch waiting in line for a mediocre chicken sandwich.

ironically, twelve years or so ago, the LGBT community started boycotting the chicken chain when their CEO publicly stated they supported the “biblical definition” of marriage.

no, jack daniels folk just HAD to know what they were doing. just had to. within a month of the whole “bud light” blow up they released a pride based ad campaign with literal drag queens from rupaul’s drag race. given the alt-right stir up at the time there is no way they didn’t know what the outcome would be. granted, these campaigns are typically planned out months in advance, but they can easily be cancelled or postponed at a moment’s notice. while i applaud JD’s decision to push forward in the wake of all that bullshit, they also had to, to a degree, know what might happen. that being said, if there’s one thing we learned from the former (and frighteningly possible future) president it’s that controversy = free press coverage. and that ain’t always a bad thing. for every nutjob that paid for your product only to destroy it on youtube (they got your money – do they care if you drink it or burn it?) there’s two or three more that could care less and another couple that will now buy it to support your stance.

you’re not watered down beer – you’re jack phukin daniels. you’ll be fine.

who knew the ultimate “fuck you combo” to the alt-right dicks would be shitty chicken nuggets and a glass of whiskey?