it’s been a while since i shared a “what the fuck” shop moment, so here we are…
…a guy came in for his first tattoo the other day. not uncommon. he picked a larger piece, costing around $400. a bit MORE uncommon, but not the end of the world. his mom came in towards the end of the process. for a guy in his forties EXTREMELY uncommon, but not for a kid in his late teens / early twenties like this one.
but then came the “really painful” part, as i call it…when you have to part with out hard earned cash. as i closed him out this is how it went…
paper or plastic?
huh?
cash or card, yo?
oh – both. i have (counts folding money) $143 dollars here…
…can we just say “$140” to make it a round number?
sure thing – and the rest on the card
(i charge out the $140 in cash)
okay, so that’ll be $260 on the card then
(i’m handed the card – it declines)
it shouldn’t have declined – i have $257 in my account…
wait – you only have $257? you should have pushed the issue with the three dollars!
(i then close out a THIRD payment method for three dollars, and attempt to re-run his card for only $257. his mom pulls out a hundred dollar bill to get change to tip the artist. i break it into twenties and when she gets upset i can’t break a twenty, i calmly explain i broke the bill out of my own money clip, and we don’t actually have a register. as we’re having this conversation her son’s card declines…again.)
why’d it decline again? (checks bank app) i have $149 in the account!
you have $149? why’d you tell me to run it for $257?
WAIT – why is it only $149? (re-checks app) oh, fuck – my insurance payment already came out!
(mom shakes her head and mumbles, “boy, i swear…”, and pushes the hundred in twenties at me apologizing for the lack of tip now present in this transaction)
“are we good?”
no, ma’am – we’re still eight bucks short.
“boy, do you have any money left on you?”
no, mama…
“boy, i swear to god…”
(and she hands me her check card to charge eight bucks. IT declines, but she realizes in the melee she and her son’s cards got switched as they look identical. she corrects this, i run her ACTUAL card and we’re done.)
for those keeping track, his payment receipt came out looking like this
CASH = $140.00
CASH = $3.00
MC = $149.00
CASH = $100.00
MC = $8.00
good thing our system will split up to nine payment methods, huh?
Good thing you’re good at math, huh.