why does this keep happening to me?

i guess the short answer is “because i’m black”…

…no, wait. that’s not right.

i guess the REAL short answer is “because i drive fast”.

that’s right – i got speeding ticket number two.

oddly enough i was, once again, clocked at going sixty-eight miles an hour. last time it was in a sixty, the ticket was via “DPS” (which for all of those outside of the great state of Texas that stands for “Department Of Public Safety”, i.e. “Texas State Troopers”) and for going eight miles over the speed limit was $220.00, but i can just pay the court half that, take a driving safety course (fucking seriously?) and it’s off my record…

…which is the plan.

but the second one, via APD (austin police department), is for sixty-eight in a FIFTY-FIVE that i swore was a sixty or sixty five but i chatted with my buddy lance yesterday (former DPD, LPD, and APD – dallas, lockhart, and austin, respectively) and he says it’s always been a 55mph zone.

oops.

the cop fudged the ticket and said i was only going sixty-five, which brought the ticket down to $165 (real speed woulda been $195) but it still means in the course of a month i’m paying around three bills for speeding bullshit after an eighteen year streak of no speeding tickets when that three bills could be going to pay off something fun, like this:

oh well, i guess when it rains, it pours. at least if i can go ANOTHER eighteen years i’ll be sixty…what are the chances they ticket sixty year olds?

well…kramer…do they?