racking up my public service points

so, another sunday sixer is upon us…

…and given what tomorrow is, you had to know what the theme would be:

six st. patrick’s tips from an older irish kid who drinks a lot

we wear shirts that look like this:


and this…


…and we’re sober when we get dressed. do you really wanna be around when the buzz kicks in?

relax, we’re professionals…

as a buddy posted earlier, “you know real irish folk don’t need a specific day to get drunk and act a fool, right?”. truth. we do this all the time, so don’t try to keep up. in real truth, this holiday is much more an american creation than an irish one…hell, at least our day isn’t us celebrating a guy getting lost and “discovering” a new land that was, in fact, inhabited already…

i know it’s pretty and all but it’s swill, you know

we don’t drink green beer. you shouldn’t either. yes, i know it’s cheap – it’s because it’s shit beer with blue food dye in it (remember – yellow and blue make green).

it ain’t about a broad

it’s “st. patrick” not “st. patty” – always trying to steal the credit, them women folk. plus, it’s the same amount of syllables – what do you think you’re shortening?

the fifth part of this bit was left as a tip ’cause i was out of drinking money

and finally…

green booze should equal a yellow cab

be safe, folks – trying to drink like me or shane and drive your ass home can end in disaster.

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