in case you needed to see another reason while i’m going to hell, here ya go…
…so the other day i was in the gym and there was this older woman who kept working out at machines near me with a younger girl by her side.
don’t worry – this doesn’t cross any legal lines. promise.
the girl was in her late teens, early twenties, actually. but the way she carried her arms and the constant rocking let you know she wasn’t mentally all there. and it was about the third station i saw them at, where the girl sat down on an ab machine to wait for her mom (or grandmother, or guardian, or kidnapper) to finish when i noticed something. she was on one machine, a guy was on the one next to her, but they were both doing the same motion – it’s just hers was involuntary.
got my mind to thinking…and nothing good ever comes of that.
sure enough – a bit later she lifted her t-shirt to wipe her forehead and bingo – absoultely ripped fucking abs.
got me thinking – if we all could just learn to rock like that in our off time we’d be ripped, too! i call it the “retarded good abs workout”.
what? like i said, i KNOW i’m going to hell…at this point i just want a good table and decent parking. problem?
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Before you go to hell, you have to do my eulogy.