my cool guy act for the week

this is going up late, and i know this…

…but i was coin tossing.

i couldn’t decide on whether or not to even DO a sixer today, and if so what the topic would be. i WAS gonna do a “six ‘great’ gifts i don’t want” bit ’cause i noticed a lot of things out there (snuggies, various infomercial crap) all have that “makes a GREAT xmas gift” labels and for my money NONE of them would make even “good” gifts, let alone “GREAT” gifts…

…but i couldn’t come up with six. and as any give xmas since i’ve been in my twenties and beyond i haven’t received a total of six gifts i decided that wouldn’t fly. and fate intervened with what was almost the tuesday entry, but i decided to make it today’s ’cause…well…it’s been a dull weekend.

before we go further, a brief illustration:

the watch on the right is what i wear, and for size comparison, the one on the left is your standard, run-of-the-mill, men’s diver watch. this makes sense in a sec.

every two weeks (and i fear this may be drawing to a close soon, but not for the best of reasons) i transfer money from the unemployment account to my regular account. i just throw both visa cards on the counter (both are chase cards) on the counter and point…

take $690 off this…(point at normal check card)…put $390 on this, and give me the rest back in cash.

so, it begins – but he gets distracted by the watch, starts asking me questions, and after i sign off (but don’t look) at all the paperwork he shuts his drawer and gives the typical, cheerful, “have a nice day”.

i say, “no”, and he says, “oh, yeah…i owe you $300”, opens his drawer, and gives me three benjamins.

two days later i check my balance on the unemployment card (expecting it to be a bit under $10) and it’s over $300. a quick transaction review shows he did all the paperwork and such for the $390 he transferred, but then just handed me three hundred dollar bills.

i knew what i had to do. i didn’t LIKE it, but i knew it.

so why did i just give $300 to chase on friday, essentially?

1. it ain’t uncle bob’s check cashing – they’re a BANK…they have a LOT of fucking cameras

2. the teller was actually a pretty cool dude

3. eventually they’d have tracked me down…might as well give it back while i still have it (and didn’t realize it so i wouldn’t miss it).

4. when i walked up to the teller his manager was just walking off and the wednesday receipts were on the counter – they were actually researching it WHEN i arrived.

5. my mom would be proud

6. it’s a karma thing, i figure

so, shane will dog on me for it – but i made the guy’s week, i’m settled up, and while i COULD use the money, as i said, it wouldn’t have been long before they came a’ callin. no need to piss off two major banks in a year, ya know?