“juan in a million” is the chances you’ll actually EAT later

we all make poor choices in life from time to time…

…mine on saturday was breakfast.

(Calories: 758 Total Fat: 39.5g Carbs: 65.5g Protein: 29g for anybody curious)

it’s the “don juan” from “juan in a million” in east austin – it’s an austin legend that’s been on the show man vs. food. if you eat SEVEN you get on the wall of fame. i ate one at 11am on a saturday morning.

i didn’t eat again till 11am on sunday. no bullshit. how the fuck do you consume SEVEN?!?!?

if you look at the fucker it looks more like a tostada than a taco as it’s painfully obvious that you can’t close the tortilla as it sits. truth be told i typically get two to three tacos (they give you extra tortillas for free) out of it’s innards before i can close the fucker up and eat it as number three (or in saturday’s case, four). and while i call it a “poor choice” because it just hurts me to consume it after a year of diet lean cuisine meals, it actually tastes really good and, truth be told, was more a choice BECAUSE i’m poor rather than a “poor choice” as the thing’s less than five bucks and will fill me up for twenty-four hours.

again, the real problem lies in that hours one through three just fuckin’ hurt.

i figured out the trick – next time i’m craving this massive pile of egg, cheese, bacon, and tater i’m gonna get somebody to HALF it with me. i think that’s the key. the whole thing hurts – maybe the half will be just right. who says there’s no such thing as too much of a good thing?

well, at least if one of your resolutions was to GAIN weight this year you know where to head in the ATX, huh?