two great tastes that do NOT taste great together

with it being in the triple digits every day around here we are all constantly looking at ways to cool down…

…but i don’t see us going as far as oscar meyer expects new yorkers to:

so before we condemn the whole, which is mathematically the sum of it’s parts, let’s look at dem parts:

“candied hot dog bits” – none of that sounds good. look, we all enjoy a hot dog and only do so mentally blocking the part of our brain that fucking KNOWS it’s assholes and lips and beaks and claws…making it into “bits” and candy coating em doesn’t help your case here.

“spicy dijon gelato” – this might be the partial saving grace, and i only say that since i live in a part of the country where jalapeño ice cream is a legit thing.

“hot dog sweet cream” – because the world needed a corporate created new euphemism for jiz.

and finally…

“cookie bun” – let’s face it, it’s just a fucking cookie

so, as much as i love me some ice cream, and i have been totally over-indulging in the latest swoon flavors lately, this just does NOT fly for me…and it shouldn’t for you, either!