never woulda guessed

i remember hearing that back in the day you could tell when somebody got porn in the mail because it came in a plain brown wrapper…

…of course nowadays, with the interwebs, who the fuck does that any more?

shit, i’m kinda shocked that some of the porno video places still stay afloat in this day and age! i was kinda intrigued by the plain white enveloped with the generic sticker with my name on it in the mail. then i noticed officially-looking government seal in the corner, so i card rolled it and smiled.

to explain, “card rolling” dates back to my collegiate days when i kinda over-did the credit card thing. i would apply for shit, the envelopes came in and always looked super generic and plain, so i’d grab an end and kinda roll the thing…and lo and behold i’d see that stiff part in the middle (heh) where i knew a (credit) card was present and i could do some more damage to myself financially…

…i’ve moved beyond that now. in today’s more “instant gratification” society i only have a check card and a paypal card, both of which instantly pull from their respective accounts and therefore create zero debt, just instant poverty!

but back to the envelope, who’s content card was even more plain-jane-generic:

in this case the card in question was a texas concealed handgun license…so apparently the wait back when i took the class a year ago (then four to six months) has been dramatically reduced, seeing as how i submitted everything on the ninth of january. shows my record is clean, i guess? oh well, now time to go shopping for something pocket-sized that goes “bang”.