monday mini tower bit

what’s funny about today’s title is there IS actually a computer at dell (where i used to work) called a “mini tower”…

…but today’s bit isn’t about computers…or even ME’s recent drama with them.

no, today’s brief bit (due to it being a late post and all) is about me, for the first time, experiencing something that most people would figure i’d experience more often – something that comes out of my mouth seeming in poor taste. now, don’t get me wrong – i damn well KNOW that there are many given times, on any given day, where i say something that, when held to the standards of the general public, could be considered in poor taste – the difference is i don’t care.

but this was one of those super RARE occasions where i actually caught it. what made it even rarer was the fact that, all things considered, the only person who could find it in poor taste WAS me. let me break it down…

…i was talking to a friend of mine who was having an uber-rough day. shit at home. shit at work. all kinds of shit EVERY WHERE. any more shit and her life would qualify for a dirty jobs segment. and after she had vented i remarked, “well, as long as you don’t hit that threshold where all of a sudden you want to climb up a clock tower and start shooting people…”

and then it seemed like it got quiet around me. that uncomfortable silence where you feel like everyone in a room is staring at you. but nobody was. and what was even more odd about said sensation was i wasn’t even in a room – i was outside. but i happened to be outside, on the university of texas campus, right at the base of the UT tower…

(see the fountain? yeah, i was sitting on the rim of the fountain)

what makes this unique is SHE heard what i said, but had no idea where i was when i said it. nobody was around me when i said it, so nobody who saw me there knew what i said. but i had the unique perspective of both knowing WHAT i said and WHERE i said it…which made it kind of freaky. the image of a deranged lunatic climbing a clock tower and shooting people is an expression, image, and scenario we’re all familiar with – but it was at that moment i realized i was saying it in the very same courtyard where people were getting plinked off as they ran for cover – the actual, literal basis for the expression and iconic image of losing your shit.

even i found that in poor taste – and to add insult to injury, my mom was actually WORKING in the tower when that shooting happened. true story.

so, in case anybody has ever wondered, “i wonder if he KNOWS what comes out of his screwed up brain?” the answer is “yes”, but i just normally don’t think twice about it. today was one of those odd occasions where i caught it, so i decided to share…it’s like haley’s comet and shit – only happens once or twice a millennium.