less than thirty minutes and it’s free?

by sean ~ December 1st, 2005. Filed under: Uncategorized.

“the redhead” is gonna love this one…

…for the civic pride factor, if for nothing else.

ya see, she’s from tampa florida. i’ve only been once, and even then only grazed through the place on i75, so i was never technically in tampa proper. never saw the gulf. never saw the big bridge. only saw the outskirts. and apparently, there’s a lot to see there…

…have you ever heard the expression, “if muhammad can not go to the mountain, then bring the mountain to muhammad”? well they brought the mountain. or mountains, as the case may be. and some of them were pierced. and one other had a tattoo on it that said “slippery when wet”.

yes, kids, it’s stripper time!!!

and finally, someone was arrested in conjunction with strippers for what i feel the real crime is…

the cover charge

some enterprising guys were arrested near a tampa bucs game this past weekend for getting a party bus (think vegas limo bus here for the visual – but bigger…it’s actually a reconfigured former broward county metro bus) and turning it into a rolling strip club. they had seven dancers crammed on board to do lap dances, plus a manager and a bouncer. they had one minor charge of “renting space for lewdness” (which in my eyes would also be a charge that could be levied on any given motel on any give afternoon if you want to split hairs) but the main charges and arrests all came in conjunction with tampa’s law against nudity where liquor is **sold** and in a commercial establishment.

the nudity? no biggie.

the lap dances? no biggie.

the liquor? no biggie – at tailgate parties (usually not so heavy on the “tail” end, as it was in this case) liquor is openly shared amongst fans before a game. but bubba’s bronco does not come with a $10 cover – and the party bus did.

and that constitutes not only a commercial establishment, but a liquor sale in the eyes of the law since even though the liquor was free, you had to pay to get access to it…

…and i’d like this to be a lesson to the industry.

we already pay your “dancers” (note, ladies – if it ain’t ballet or tap, it’s not “dancing”. you’re grinding on my cock in a thong. you’re a STRIPPER. accept it, and move on to the many, MANY other issues most of you need to accept from your childhood, adolescence, etc, etc). we already pay six bucks for a drink of four for a beer. there’s no need to have us pay at the door, too.

stop milking it.

or at least follow in footsteps of one manager in austin and give me a v.i.p. card so i don’t have to pay. but for the greater good, just get rid of it. you’ll get your money in other ways…trust me.