the weekend, part iii “painting day”

okay, so “painting day” didn’t quite live up to it’s name. YES, painting got done. it did. really. but let’s look at how, or more accurately WHEN painting day ended. let’s put it this way; it’s 2:30 am (on monday; only five and a half hours before i have to leave for work, and i haven’t slept yet) , and i JUST emptied the ashtray with the butts of benita’s visit earlier, which ended at 7:00 (right after the season finale for the simpsons, which we were both a bit disappointed with) and right before my somewhat ill-fated trip to the alamo city.

flash back a half hour, to straight up 2:00 am, and i was washing my car at the astro-brite car wash in san marcos. what level of automotive vanity would prompt someone to wash their car about five hours before they’re supposed to be rolling out of bed, you might ask? the same level of automotive vanity achieved by those who don’t want to start their work week rolling into the company parking garage with what can best be described as a “tequila tag” splattered across the passenger side of their vehicle (not to be confused with the “dude, i SWEAR it says ‘latin kings’ up there” scalp tag that had been privately discussed earlier in the evening, but i digress…)

yes, it seems that while kimberly, the porn star in training, can swallow loads of fluid that most women can’t handle, the one load she CAN’T hang with is round numero tres of frozen top-shelf margaritas at chacho’s. which is a damn shame.

see, i WAS gonna do a nice, normal little bit about the varying levels of brown that were ending up in my house as i was painting, and how i was one of the few straight guys who could tell the difference between beige, tan, and khaki; or as their known in the paint world, “sesame”, wheat”, and “adobe”. but NO, kimberly and i had to go to chacho’s on a sunday night, you know what happens at chacho’s on a sunday night? some lame-ass local sa band? oh no…much, much worse. lets just say that they need a sign i feel a few austin places need, too; one that reads:

“WARNING: It’s KARAOKE NIGHT. Plan your drinking accordingly”

because of that, i SO needed three rounds of the tequila-filled, jumbo-sized, frozen margaritas that chacho’s is famous for. put kimberly, who is a bit more than half a foot shorter than me, and underweighs me by a good bit to boot, REALLY needed to go nancy reagan (as in, “just say NO”) to round number three. but she didn’t ,so i ended up at “astro-brite” car wash at 2:00 am on a monday, and now REALLY need to crash. i think i need to stop naming my days, huh? but none the less, remember this: only thiry more shopping days till my birthday. plan your drinking accordingly. i KNOW i will… (and for the record, it’s now 3:00 am, only five hours before i have to leave for work)

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