how i don’t hurt i don’t know

as of last month i have lived in my house for thirty-five years…

…and as of yesterday i saw parts of it for the first time ever. it was quite an adventure.

a leak in the roof that started as minor got more and more major and finally an actual hole developed in my roof. i think it’s fixed. we haven’t had any rain yet, so i suppose time will tell. but you go at a job like that and you’re not used to living la vida attic (how JAB does this on the regular i have NO idea) and you learn new stuff about your stuff AND you’re home. a few of the lessons:

i can “duck walk” a lot further than i thought i could – big concern for me was getting a skateboard sized piece of lumber AND my drill the length of my house via the attic where i have to balance on beams…set the drill down on a cross beam through the hole in the roof, then just took the board…twice. got there only to find it needed to be cut way down to fit between rafters properly. thought that would hurt more today than it does…even still did legs at the gym that day!

it don’t get lower than my shower – the ceiling over my shower is a foot lower than any other point in the house, which caught me way off guard when i saw it…till i realized that has to happen to accommodate the ceramic tile ceiling. who knew?

i’m a better electrician than i give myself credit for…thankfully – the hole was low enough to be on the part of the roof where i had to lay down across the beams to do the job – and my head had to rest on the metal juncture box and wire splices sticking up out of it…so my bare bald head is on a metal box and wire nuts surrounded by wet insulation – a recipe for disaster, but i’m still here to type this. i’m not JAB or anything, but half that wiring is his dad and half is me…and i didn’t twitch or nothin’!

my other leaks are invisible – this one is obvious, and i have a feeling the “multiple leaks” in my bedroom stem from the big fuck-all hole in the roof (okay, so only about six by eight inches, but that’ll let a LOT of water flow in)…and the one over the hall i already knew (and might have fixed, but again next rain will tell, and we have had some “god hates you” kind of rain as of late). but the office? the kitchen? i couldn’t see anything that would cause those, be it in the attic or on the roof – guess next big rain i gotta go up to my territory and see if i can see some water a’flowin’…

it ain’t as bad as i thought – i had feared cleaning the attic due to what i figured was the amount of crap up there – but now not so much. hell, i might shoot for doing it all by xmas so i can get teri to haul all her crap out.

and finally…

there’s money to be had – i found a train set my grandfather gave me (that i have no real attachment to, i might add) that i thought was 1960’s but it turns out it’s from 1976 (still older than the ufc!) and one just sold yesterday on eBay for $200. i could use $200. guess we know what will be the next listing, and maybe this time some motherfucker will actually pay for what they bid on – but that’s an entry for another day (look for that rant in forty-eight hours)

1 comment… add one
  • sean Oct 27, 2013 @ 18:03

    and apparently i’m not much of a roofer, either – the rains came this morning and the problem was as bad as ever…which how that’s possible with at least 99% of that hole blocked up i have no idea!

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