titty time! (a throwback)

how i’ve never re-posted this one, i’ll never know…

…but the perfectly aged one from today had already been used, so here we are.

08/21/2007: “fixer-upper?”

nobody’s perfect…

…and the people that say they are clearly are conceited as fuck and therefore prove the statement incorrect the second they utter the phrase.

we all have something we wish we could improve on…our weight, our height, our hairline (for guys), our bustline (for girls), etc, etc, etc. knowing we have these areas of improvement shows we are in touch with ourselves…DOING something about them shows we are pro-active, and goal-oriented.

yeah, let’s think about that last thing i said for a minute…

if you’re overweight and dieting, or hitting the track, or what have you, that’s cool. if you’re scrubbing some goop into your scalp in hopes of having that thick, lustrous mane you had in high school, i guess that’s cool. but i’m unsure as to how i feel about a website i heard about on the radio this morning…

…and if anyone wants to take one for the team and join it, let me know.

it’s a site where guys can go to meet women…who want bigger tits. from what i heard on the radio, the guys first few emails to the girls are free…but then it’ll cost you. and for each email you send, you have to pay money which goes towards that girl’s boob job. you can request little pictures with her dressed up like a naughty librarian, or a nun, or whatever, and even videos – and i’m sure all at a premium price.

think of it like a “lap dance kit” – you can get the girl you like to have the boobs you want, you just have to pay up front…and it’s a LOT more than $20 a song.

i wonder what happens if a girl DOESN’T reach the “magic number” to get “gummi bear implants” (an actual procedure referred to on the site) or whatever…does she get to take the money and run, all be it in a non-jiggly way? or does the site simply absorb it? is there a time limit? if not, i would think any girl in her mid-thirties that might be concerned about father time and pimp-daddy gravity slapping her around in a few more years could start planning now, right?

so if you’re a woman with phenomenally low self esteem, or a guy who is seriously desperate and thinks buying a pretty (i would hope they’re all pretty) girl new boobs will make her want to fuck you (and god help you for that level of delusion – why do you think girls dance more than ONE shift in a strip club? it’s not ’cause they’re waiting for the right man to come along, i assure you…) there’s a place for you to converge on one another.

just do me a favor and NEVER breed with each other. a money-dropping idiot of that caliber combined with a girl with that level of pathology could breed the next great super-villain without even trying.

Replies: 2 Comments

baby, i can say with dead-on accuracy – you have boobs. really nice ones. let it go.

sean said @ 08/22/2007 11:02 PM CST

That was too funny. I want boobs

me said @ 08/22/2007 12:23 PM CST

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