english, motherfucker, do you speak it? (a throwback)

life is a series of cycles; and yesterday, unfortunately, one cycle ended for a buddy of mine…the “working shows for star” cycle. it seems that at the sheryl crow show (which i skipped due to the weather and what i THOUGHT would be a somewhat hectic week that has turned into an incredibly hectic week) something, somehow, someway pushed him into a profanity-laden tangent within ear shot of the promoter and he was “no longer welcome” to work their shows…..so guess who has to fill in on THREE all-day shows that fill the hole between the show i was scheduled to work LAST night and the jewel show on sunday?

that’s right…MY dopey ass.

the three shows in question are not-so-little hippy shows for widespread panic. two of the three are already sold out. like WAY sold out. like no prayer of a release kinda sold out. but what i’ve learned is, that is a term the general public doesn’t seem to grasp, which baffles me.

last night i worked our lady peace, which MUCH to my surprise sold the fuck out. pretty early in the night, too. so, i made two signs…one to hang in each box office window, and then me and nate stayed (i get to work with him at all three widespreads AND jewel…talk about bonding, huh?) to do guest list and pre-paid will call (like when you order over the phone or internet). the sign in HIS window said…

OUR LADY PEACE HAS SOLD OUT!!!
(not meant in that “they’ve gotten too commercial sort of way…)

keep in mind, it WAS me who hand wrote the signs…they were half-sheet size, and i put them at eye level to the customers. the one on my window was a bit longer; it said…

OUR LADY PEACE IS
SOLD OUT!!!
THAT’S RIGHT, KIDS
SOLD OUT!!!
YES, WE ARE SERIOUS

and we STILL had customers coming up and asking for tickets. or seeing if we would release unclaimed (but already paid for) will call. or just sell ’em one “so my kids can go in and see the show…”. the last guy even added (in front of his teenage kids, no less) “if you won’t float me two to get them in, what does that teach them about this world?”

do you guys remember the “don’t be melodramatic rule” from yesterday? i fired back at him (in front of his kids), “it teaches them the value of planning ahead and not waiting till the last minute so they don’t have to embarrass themselves begging for something that ISN’T gonna happen…”

(understand the two quotes from this yutz i put on here are just bits of a five minute diatribe of his i had to sit through, all done in the name of making ME look like the asshole because i have this inability to “hook up” a perfect stranger who happens to NOT be female and cute, two exceptions to the “stranger hook up” scenario…so, FUCK him)

and at a hippy show, it’s a whole different world. these are kids that have been taught that money (which most of their parents make sure they have PLENTY of, despite their appearance) is not the only commodity in this world. they also feel they can trade affection (note: NOT sex), hand-made crafts, food, weed (okay that last one MIGHT just work if it’s good, not shake, not filled with stems and seeds…aw, you know the rules) in order to get into a sold out show; or in the case of tonight’s gig, buy a ticket.