my nose has balls of steel

the title to this bit, i’m afraid, can be taken quite literally…

…and not because i’ve been raped by a robot.

no, a kiss yesterday led to an odd revelation. ya see, both the ufc and i have our noses pierced…but yesterday we went to kiss and locked up – the stud in hers snagged one of the hoops in mine (mine’s done twice). it’s one of those things you don’t notice till you start to pull apart…and then you REALLY notice.

i went to a mirror and noticed my ring was WAY askew…but it was weird, ’cause with one simple move it popped right back into place. then i tried to rotate the ring to make sure the ball was still firmly in place, but it wouldn’t rotate. i thought it was just angry and possibly a bit swollen since it had just gotten snagged, but upon closer inspection i found that my nose ring resembled a lot of the media in how they approach anything but fluff topics these days…

…no visible balls.

there are two theories on this – but only one seems realistic to me:

1. the balls on the captive bead rings fell out (both of ’em), then both rings rotated to where the open part was in my nose, then the nose healed that part kind of sealing the rings in till i decide to remove or re-pierce.

or…

2. the balls have literally become part of my nose from me obsessively rotating them up into my nasal cavity and the inner wall of my nose just grew over them (which is what i’m thinking happened)…

…hence the title of today’s bit (“my nose has balls of steel”).

the down side is the only way to check this shit is to pull the rings and squeeze the side of my nose…it should be pretty obvious if there are a pair of 2mm surgical steel beads in my nostril…but if we do that, i don’t know if we can line the rings up again, and if option one above it right, then we’d have to re-pierce.

so i’ll leave well enough alone.

we sell good quality jewelry, and the steel is supposed to be “implant grade”, meaning it’s not harmful to be implanted into you…guess now i’ll find out the hard way, huh?

my fault for finally getting pierced outside of the 1990’s…