my next gig?

the ufc noticed something about tattoo shop folk at harold’s recent thing…

…we all talk shop. a lot.

it’s because it’s a fun gig. don’t get me wrong – i could probably crawl back into a cubicle and make more money. hell, i might actually have to eventually. but for now? i’ll fight it tooth and nail to actually ENJOY going to work instead. the industry is fun, the hours are right, and i enjoy the people – both customers and co-workers. plus, i get to say “fuck” a lot and wear cargo shorts and skate shoes to work; how can you go wrong?

but back to the history lesson…

…a somewhat new guy with us (i use the term “somewhat” as he worked with the company a number of years ago, went off to nyc, and now came back) was complaining about nyc clientele, saying they come in and just ask, “well, what’s popular right now? i want that…” or all get the same tattoo to identify with certain sub genres of popular new york culture.

i don’t see that as bad – i see it as a return to our roots.

when you think about this art form we do (and i say “we” even though i fully acknowledge that i am NOT one of the artists…but if i have to work 50+ hours a week including dozens of calls and texts about shop shit on my day off i feel i can say “we”) it started in tribal culture, pre-dating jesus by centuries, as a way to mark what tribe you were in or what you accomplished in said tribe. it marked you as what you were…

…and very little has changed.

so, you want an infinity? with the word “love” worked into the bottom of it? brilliant! what? well, of COURSE you want it upside down so it looks upright and readable when YOU look at it, not other people…after all, you paid for it, and you have to see it more than anybody!

that lets me know you’re a follower of whatever micro-trend is tweeting or pinning right now and you always will…i know your “tribe” already.

so, you want “#YOLO!” on your neck? great! the douche tribe needed a new chief!

and so forth…

…it did make me seek out a new way to create a nice hybrid between my current cool job and corporate america, where the pay and benefits package is better…a tattoo consultant. not to consult on what tattoo to get, but rather how the tattoos somebody acquired BEFORE coming into your business looking for a job says something about who you’re hiring!

multiple text lines on the wrist? no, she’s not a religious nut – she’s covering teenage “cutter” scars…damaged goods – will complain about EVERYTHING and always been insecure until she finally snaps. pass.

looks like make-up on his neck? probably is – covering that “#YOLO!” neck piece – that’s a sexual harassment suite (or three) waiting to happen…bail that shit.

see – i could help get companies running smoother…maybe single handedly turn around the economy. opening salary is $75K – any takers?

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