13 miles, thousands of runners, only fifteen rounds in the clip…well, damn!

all i wanted to do was go to lunch…

…dopey fucking me.

the plan was simple…TOO simple. i was gonna go hit the tattoo shop, grab a friend that worked there, and then head off to lunch. i left my house at 10am. normally takes forty-five minutes to get there. THIS time it took an hour and a half to get from my house to the tattoo shop.

why?

the austin fucking marathon. it winds its way through austin, snaking through business and residential neighborhoods, segmenting the city into two halves – and unless you have a badge (as in cop) or some really girly-ass shorts on you’re not allowed to cross the border it creates. period. i tried (no bullshit) seventeen different places and was denied all the way until the last one…and that involved you having to PARK on a four lane, fifty mile per hour road, and wait for TWENTY FUCKING MINUTES.

maybe i just don’t get it…’cause here are six things i would rather do than run thirteen point whatever miles – and these are things i’d rather NOT do ordinarily:

1. watch a miley cyrus movie – probably spelled her name wrong…and i’m okay with that.
2. clean house – and i SERIOUSLY don’t like to clean house. my house reflects this.
3. church – yea, though it would cause me to burst into flames…
4. sit through a golf tournament on tv – BOH-ring
5. get drunk with morons – talk about potential for UGLY
6. get my junk tattooed – okay, maybe that one went a bit too far…

…but seriously, why the fuck would anybody need to run that far if they’re not being chased?

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • transamdan Feb 22, 2010 @ 10:12

    id run 13. plus than watch or hear anything miley cyrus!

  • Shane Feb 23, 2010 @ 11:56

    Ok man, I think you shoulda tried harder on the six cause…
    1) Ok, you got me on that…but this coming from the guy that OWNS Oscar?
    2) We all gotta do it sometime.
    3) Boring but you can sleep there so not all that bad.
    4) See above without all the standing, singing and the like.
    5) I do that every family reunion.
    6) You got me on that one, it fits the sixer.

  • sean Feb 23, 2010 @ 13:13

    okay, i know this sixer sucked but it went up as it did ’cause…

    1) i was really pissed at the runners AT THE TIME but a week later the hate was gone

    2) i had a hectic week and thought the bit was already written only to discover it wasn’t

    3) i had a bunch going on sunday so i just cranked it out

    4) a coin was literally flipped to see if i do this OR a re-run…personally, i think we mighta lost the toss here

    etc, etc, etc…

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