friday ball handling and an early sixer (a flashback)

i’m not gonna lie…

…when i read the title even i hoped this bit would go in a different direction. a bit under the fifteen year mark, but as close as we could do…

02/10/2003: “take your hands off those balls”

so, tonight was the nba all-star game, reminding us that jordan is retiring…again. and reminding us that we still wanna fuck the brains out of mariah carey (although recent interviews i’ve seen with her might indicate some one has already done that in the literal sense). and josh and i were reminded about all the goings on as i received a call (not from a guy) to let me know that they were on their way to watch the game at hooter’s. damn sad when a girl’s night is more guy-like than mine, huh?

one of the funniest commercials in jordan’s career is running right now. to explain his “passion” for the game, he says to “play each game as if it were your last”. for a man that will soon retire from the nba for his THIRD time, that’s not a mental stretch, i’d imagine…but let’s move on.

this weekend also marked the return of pool and booze night for me and josh. we TRIED to do it friday night, and got there around 10:30 or so (josh got off work at 10:00) and waited almost an hour for a table to no avail (one week off and they’d forgotten who we were?), but hooked up on saturday AND didn’t have to pay for the pool (much better…). one thing i’ve seen at bum’s billiards (our usual haunt) is something you don’t see at many places. people that actually get too drunk to play pool. not that I’VE reached that level of intoxication, but i’ve seen it done. and some might argue i’ve come close. but i’ve had demons to battle lately, damn it…leave me the fuck alone. at least i’ve never…

1. tried to snort the hand chalk
2. been dragged out of the bathroom for fighting with the novelty machine for giving me this fucked-up sex toy instead of a condom only to have it pointed out to me that i had been in the lady’s room and that i was in a fight with the tampon dispenser.
3. reached into the pocket of the table for more than two minutes, twisting my hand around and mumbling, “you like that, don’t ya bitch?” as i do so.
4. gone home with a girl who licked the tip of her cue suggestively before the final shot of a game (although some might see that as a bad thing)
5. crapped in the urinal
6. broken the stick over my knee after i miss an important shot only to look down and realize i bring my own in…

how was THAT for a smooth transition into the sunday six pack? (okay…TECHNICALLY monday morning…sue me). and for that matter, how scary is it that i based a lot of these on TRUE occurrences (NOT involving me, i might add…just WITNESSED by me)

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