if this jinxes me, i have only myself to blame

so, i set it in my head i needed to do this bit today…

…so, if this fucks me i did it to myself.

so, a few months ago i bought a pair of these:

which basically look like water shoes (“aqua socks” as nike dubbed them back in the 90’s) got raped by crocs (check out the sole) and retail for $110. at the time they were still on several running and footwear websites for over a bill. but at the nike outlet? they were already marked down to $35, and with a ten dollar coupon i had i was grabbing em for $25. my plan was to list em on eBay for $50, possibly double my money, and if not, fuck it – we had a shop river trip planned, i could take em as river shoes no harm no foul.

so i bought the fuckers and listed them the same day.

two weeks and three listings later there was one buyer who never paid, and otherwise nada. but while the river trip WAS looming, i had (in the interim) made an appointment to get the ozzy tattoo done and didn’t wanna be sunburned so i opted to meet for the food afterwards but skip the aquatic journey, cutting out the need for the shoes. so they were re-listed a few more times with nothing to show for it and eventually all my listings fell off and i just let them ride offline for a while.

at the beginning of october i revamped BUT dropped some prices, including the footwear above, which i dropped to $39.99. they had started at $49.99 and i’d dropped to $44.99 but figured if i even got thirty out of them i won, ya know? but they sold at $39.99 to a guy in miami with a really low rating, but he paid me within hours so i shipped them…

…which is where things get interesting.

it shows it made it to florida, and then to miami, but then NOT in miami…but on ITS WAY to miami, and apparently is on the back of a slow-moving alligator because it’s STILL on its way. me and ufc think it actually not only made it to miami, but to homedude’s spot, it’s just somehow gotten mixed up with a glitch in the system. this makes sense because…

1. he hasn’t asked for a refund
2. he hasn’t filed against me on eBay or even asked where his shit is

but as far as the post office shows, it didn’t make it. and, i suppose, there IS still a chance he could file against me and demand a refund and, due to the fact i can’t ever show it “delivered”, i can’t do shit about it, and would have to give up the dough. so i filed with the postal service, including a screen shot of what he paid for the item AND for shipping:

a grand total of $53.19. since all priority mail shipments come automatically with fifty bucks of insurance, and i didn’t pay for anything extra, i figured i’d have to absorb the $3.19 but they’d get the fifty bucks for me. but i was wrong – i REQUESTED $50.00, but they APPROVED $61.81. i have no idea where that number came from. but it means that even if he DOES request a refund i can refund in full and still up my total to about fifty bucks, or double what i invested in the shoes originally. if he DOESN’T file, than i didn’t double my money – i quadrupled it.

so big thanks to nike for giving me the ten dollar coupon that got me in the store in the first place, and thanks to us postal service for being so cool. i guess now i’m just waiting for a check to come in the mail…assuming it gets here okay. they didn’t provide a tracking number.