it’s friday, i’m confused (a half ass sixer)

i figure since i (sorta) did a sixer LAST saturday i could be lazy this sunday and only do half a sixer…

…plus friday morning had a enough weirdness to warrant it’s own bit and i wanted to do it before i forgot.

that “new math” our parents always bitched about?

apparently i’m a bit too on top of my toll bill. i got a statement showing i owed less than five bucks for tolls this much because i overpaid last month. but here’s the deal – you can’t overpay with them. you go to their website and it has ONE radio button to tick for paying. one amount. no more, no less. but it seems when i pay and when they generate bills isn’t syncing up so i’m constantly off. so my paper bill shows i have to pay under five bucks, but their website says just under fifty. i called, took an hour with a rep only to be told i needed to speak to a supervisor (after i was put on hold for the third time to “research things” i told her i did that trick when i new at dell and clueless, and just asked for somebody who “knew what the fuck is going on”). a couple hours later i got a call that explained how what i was seeing on the site was billed SINCE the bill so i was basically paying in advance on my next statement, but would have been paying them that extra forty-five bucks eventually anyway. i’m sure the next statement will bring the same shit.

can you sea foam a mower?

i mowed the grass post toll call fiasco and towards the end noticed something missing…my mower’s gas cap. it only twists down a half turn to lock it shut and is tethered to the mower but i’ve seen it pop off more than once it’s just the tether USUALLY catches it. this time it didn’t. i ended up having to stop at that point, looked all up under every tree and shrub in the yard (of which there are many) to no avail. i went load it in the storage room of the garage, spilling some gas all over the place, and went to edge. when i came back to put the weed eater in the store room i saw the gas cap right at the doorway, which means it must have fallen off the mower and just hung out on it till i lifted it into the store room…i had noticed it missing out in the yard, and the only other time it went through that door was when i pulled it out and put gas in, and the cap was present then. when i thought it was gone i found the cap on amazon and it has one star reviews due to it always falling off…so there you go.

no good deed goes unpunished

when i was unemployed for the first half of 2009 some shit went bad financially and got charged off. that happens. after seven years the debt legally can’t be gone after, but there are people that buy aged debt and harass you into paying it because if you don’t know any better you will. i know better. one of mine got sold to some folks into new jersey so i get threatening voice mails every couple months and blow ’em off. when i saw a missed jersey call with voicemail i figured it was them…but it wasn’t. i listened to the voicemail and it was an older sounding woman with a new your accent trying to rent property in austin for six weeks to see her grandson. not wanting her to have her heart set on this place but think the owners had blown her off i called her back to let her know her THREE MINUTE voicemail had been left on the wrong phone.

my bad for doing so. this woman was super talkative. now real quickly think about who’s saying that. me. if you know me, you know what a statement that is. here’s my part of the conversation word for word, hers is paraphrased:

ma’am, you called about the rental proerty in austin?
yes, it looks adorable, but your rates are ridiculous. i used to live in austin, and back when i was there….(two minutes of comparison of 2016 rental rates vs 1970’s real estate costs)
i understand that, but dear i don’t think you get it…
no sir, YOU don’t get it! this town rapes people on rental rates these days…absolutely RAPES them. we’re both retired military, and my husband is a captain in the FDNY. all we want is some time with our grandson, and rent here in brooklyn is…(five more minutes of mortgage prices in brooklyn and jersey as compared to the “outlandishness” that is the rental rate on property i don’t even fucking own, plus a slight history of their military careers)
sweetie, i don’t…
you don’t, alright – you don’t understand how rarely we get to see my grandson since our son had to move to austin because of his wife’s job. you don’t understand what austin used to be like before the greedy and the hipsters move in (three more minutes about the austin i grew up in, which i more than understand since i was FUCKING HERE).
I DON’T OWN RENTAL PROPERTY!!!
wait…you what? (that one i didn’t have to paraphrase)
i don’t own rental property (and i go on to explain my whole ‘if you really liked it i didn’t want you to think the ACTUAL property owners were ignoring you’ reason for calling)
oh, sweetie, i’m sorry – i’ll double check the number…thanks for calling back!

and then i got to finish the edging of the yard. that’s a decent amount of crazy shit for three hours before noon on a friday!

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