lazy part i, for the ufc’s son

i’m spending a lot of time on the house this week for the ufc’s kid…

…and seeing as how he’s at his dad’s in colorado springs, i figure we’d do a flashback friday from when i was there last:

04/29/2003: “god’s garden has no flowers?”

sunday evening…8:02 pm mdt…and i’m perched on a red sandstone rock ledge. the location is the garden of the gods in colorado springs, colorado. i sit there amongst a group of granola munchers who have all free-climbed to this ledge about 60 feet up to watch the sun set over pike’s peak. as i watched our day star disappear behind the tallest point in north america, i feel re-born, and a reality hits me that i had never accepted…

…i hate each and every one of you.

just kidding…maybe.

seriously, though….i LOVE me some texas. y’all know this. i would rather refer to a McRib as “damn fine bar-b-que” and follow it with an after-dinner dutch masters than live anywhere else (this of course breaking most of my ‘life is too short to eat bad bar-b-que, smoke bad cigars, or date ugly women’ rule…) but this garden o’ the gods place has got to be one of the most beautiful things i’ve ever seen. i was gonna put a link up to some pics, but the ones on their site just don’t do it justice…

how (or why) i ended up on that ledge was even more amusing. see, as i wandered about, i saw all types sitting on cliffs waiting for the sunset…but they all had rapeling gear. and special shoes. and helmets, and harnesses, and d-rings (oh my!). but then i saw this group on a set of boulders not quite as high, but still up there. and they had their little yip dog with them. you know the type…the kind wealthy, older white women have. the kind calum refers to as an appetizer. and i said to myself…

“if the little puta dog can do it, i KNOW i can do it…”

so i took off my rings and started climbing. got up there in next to no time, plopped down, introduced myself, declined the offer of shroomage, and watched the sun go down. then they all grabbed their shit, PUT THE DOG IN A BACKPACK STYLE CARRIER, and started back down. oops. i sat there a bit longer contemplating life, love, and how the FUCK i was gonna make it back down, when i heard a screech above me and saw two falcons take off for their evening’s hunt…and as they did, a group of about half a dozen rocks fell to the ground next to me. i picked them up as a souvenier and began my descent, as eight words echoed through my skull…

free climbing: up…easy. down…NOT so easy.

live and learn, right? hey…at least i didn’t bust my ass.

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