creatures of the night (not a review of a shitty KISS record)

i figured with it being the winter solstice, aka the longest night of the year, we should talk a bit about a new creature that inhabits it…

…and a quick note to my female readers: i am NOT talking about the ridiculous gender-neutral wuss that passes for a vampire or werewolf in tween movies these days. so hope you’re not looking for my opinion on the twilight series here.

i’m talking about something JAB brought up that i thought was a term he coined. hell, he almost got part credit on this bit till i googled it. no, sadly, i’m talking about “guidnecks”.

guidnecks (GWEED-neks)(n)- a person who embraces the culture of the kids on the mtv show jersey shore (i.e. fake tans, gelled hair, “juicing”, fist pumping, etc) but is actually from the south, typically texas.

yes, sadly, my home state is actually mentioned in the definition. why? because most of the entries in google mention texas enough to where i feel this may just be us. while rednecks are everywhere, particularly through the south, it seems the the lone star state is the lone place where small-town four wheel drive-driving rednecks saw jersey shore and thought to themselves, “i want me some of that snooky pussy”.

here’s a note, dipshits – nicole (aka “snookie”) isn’t even italian – she’s chilean, which is just a remixed version of a mexican as far as your concerned (and their flag looks a lot more like ours than the mexican one does) so you basically had it here all along.

at writing time i have yet to witness this phenomenon, but will have to venture to the bars of san marcos to see if i can get pics before this bit goes up. JAB has tipped me off to their usual stomping grounds, and while they’re not bars i actually frequent, i may have to take one for the team and go looking one thursday night, as i’m sure that’s when their mating season starts (some things about that college haven’t changed in the fifteen years since i left it) and it’s the only “weekend” night i have free.

let the hunt begin – if there’s pics below, you know i was successful…and if not i might have shot one of them in another way…