oh – em – gee

if you’re thirteen, i guess it’s okay…

…but if you’re over thirty, and you feel compelled to SPEAK in text message form, if you don’t get help at charter i hope you get help somewhere – ’cause that’s seriously fucked up.

c’mon, son!

i get it in text form – back in the day, when texting first started to replace that ol’ school “speaking” shit, it made more sense to send “OMG” (six key strokes) versus “oh my god” (infinitely more) or whatever…and i dated a girl down in SA who had, i can only guess, seventeen anytime minutes on her mobile, but unlimited texts – so during that summer i got rather adept at texting…but i still have a tendency to use ACTUAL words rather than text speak…

…dopey me for speaking english and shit.

i know i’ve gone off on the whole text speak thing, and it bugs me when people crossover the text shorthand to emails – from where i’m sitting, if you ARE sending email from your phone you have a good enough data plan to where you probably splurged on a phone with a real keyboard, so use real words!

(and if you DIDN’T get a phone with a real keyboard don’t punish me, the reader of said email, for YOUR thriftiness….i’m just sayin’!)

but now things are going a bit far – people have started SPEAKING in text terms. i’m all cool with the fact that we’re coming full circle and actually TALKING to each other again…that’s a good thing! but to SPEAK in text shorthand? that makes no sense. let me address the two most common that i have to HEAR a lot lately…

OMG – short for “oh my god!”: OMG has three syllables, as does the phrase “oh my god”, so this makes no sense – it’s not shorter, it’s not easier to enunciate, and for all the world i don’t know why you wouldn’t just say “oh my god” – unless for some fucked up reason you think it’s blasphemous to say so (hence the people that actually still say “oh my GOSH”) in which case do you really think you’ll get less fire and brimstone up your ass for abbreviating it? if you’re THAT hardcore with your bible thumping you know god knows all, even text speak!

WTF – short for “what the fuck?”: again, if it’s an ease of speak or time issue, “WTF” actually has FIVE syllables where as “what the fuck?” only has three. if it’s an audience issue (i have to admit saying “f” doesn’t seem to rile people up like when you say “fuck”) then you’re hanging with the wrong fucking people…and, again, if it’s a religious issue the lord KNOWS what “wtf” means – if you’re gonna say it, go for the gold and just say “what the fuck?”.

there’s i’m done…and while writing this i realized i had this page named “wtf?”, which actually had a reason behind it, but as i have now convinced myself to change directions on that, too, i think we’ll have to change it to what it SHOULD be now…