death of an icon (part ii…sorta?)

this hearkens back to TWO older bits, actually…

…one just a month or so ago (can you believe it’s been that long?) and one so old it got “lost in the fire”, let’s say, as a nice euphemism for when my hosting company screwed the pooch and “burned down” my 1,500 entry archive file (covering everything from feb 2002 to feb 2008).

but back to the topic at hand…today an icon didn’t actually “die”, but they were laid to rest – i buried tish.

now some of you regular readers are thinking, “dude, what the fuck? you did a bit about her passing a while back. we laughed. we cried. it became a part of us…

(okay, so that might be pushing it a bit)

…but any way you slice it (no autopsy pun intended) it’s been a while, and dead bodies are not known for their “potpourri-like aroma” – so where has she been all this time?”

sadly, the freezer.

you may recall she had a necrotic tumor and as a result had to be instantly deep frozen to curb THAT nasty smell at the vet’s. despite my battle with my waistline i’m not a fan of frozen food; so my freezer, at most, will have three bottles of liquor (vodka, rumple, and jaeger), a bag of ice, and some ice cream. plenty of extra room. so, ironically, the pet i tried to keep warm for almost two decades has been in the freezer for the last several weeks. not for irony of living where i stored her food. not ’cause i couldn’t deal with her death. simply for the odd circumstance of me NOT having a shovel to dig the hole…

…that’s kinda fucked up, no?

if she wasn’t such a handy freezer size (she’s coiled up, in case you’re curious how eight and a half feet is “handy freezer size”) and with no woman in the house there was no veto vote on her going in there, which would have had to have happened for at least an hour or so…just not a MONTH or so. but with no shovel, and in many ways no harm done, it just kinda happened…

…which takes me back to the much older bit, ’cause we went through a similar thing with my maternal grandmother almost a decade ago. at 4’9″, give or take, (just guessing – if any of the family is reading correct me in the comments…but they never read me) she was pretty conveniently sized, but i’m pretty sure there are laws against storing grandma in the deep freeze…even in texas. but when my grandma died she had donated her body to science – and no rotting corpse coupled with numerous scheduling difficulties equaled her death and her funeral being separated by about six weeks or so. that’s not cool. i’ll have to look, but i don’t think grandma ’tish took it there…

…which brings me back to the other point of that older entry – when i die, assuming harold’s still around (and if not i’ll have to have a backup artist do it) i want an expiration date done of the bottom of my foot, and by that date i need to buried or cremated (i’m leaning towards the latter) which needs to be within one week of me expiring. i think this older bit is what inspired the toe tag shane had tattooed on his foot that says something similar, complete with his (forged) legal signature.

so for anyone around when i die (which you never know, might be sooner than later) keep that in mind. but for now, rest in peace, morticia…finally.

(and thanks to JAB for finally loaning me a shovel)

One thought on “death of an icon (part ii…sorta?)”

  1. I think there’s an FB quiz you can take to determine your exact date of death along with the mode of death… According to this quiz I will die in 4 years from choking on toothpicks. Check it out!
    RIP Tish!

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